@Light_Eater,
Thank you, my friend. I hope you have been well. May the joy that the Holiday Seasons are meant to bring fill your heart. I wish you and yours all the best during this often trying season. It is no longer the source of joy and expectations of wishes being fulfilled it once was when I was a child, but if I try, I find I am able to let some of the feelings of joy into my heart, I can get a small but important part of what I once felt. It is very hard for me to do, but each year I try and each year I seem to be able to let a bit more in. I will be thinking of you and sending you feelings of healing and joy during my meditations. All my best to you. No matter your past, you are what you are right now at this very moment. your actions determine what it is that you are, not what you did or what you think. I can feel your struggle, but I also see the actions of a brave and compassionate person with a would that burns brightly, sometimes even peeking through the hard thick wall you have tried so hard to build to shield you.
I may be wrong or I may be right, it matters not which. This is what I see and feel when we communicate. You only need work on searching to get in touch with your perfect inner being, your soul, something I believe that nearly every person on earth has, except for a very few severely damaged souls, and even they can heal. there is ALWAYS hope, all you need do is believe and then work on getting in touch with your bright side and turning away from the dark.
Thanks again for your message, Its good to hear from you. Although I like your screen name, I do not believe that is what you are on a Spiritual level at least
. If you "Eat the Light," make sure to let it shine through your barriers as often as possible. As long as you are not a Light destroyer you will be fine! If you run across a safe free version of Corel Word Perfect Pro 2020 let me know, would you?
Namaste,
~BB?